


Lean On Me

by Alyzah_x769



Series: Of summer storms and heavy hearts [3]
Category: Produce 101 (TV), VICTON (Band)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-07-11
Packaged: 2020-06-26 10:46:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19766587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyzah_x769/pseuds/Alyzah_x769
Summary: Seungwoo always bears things alone, but Byungchan's there to remind him he doesn't have to♡ Fluff~





	Lean On Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hello :) This took me 3 days to write (I have realised my fics are perpetually way longer than I expect them to be hahahah....) So I hope you'll enjoy it :) Kudos, comments, constructive criticisms are welcome, please dont flame me >< Enjoy♡
> 
> Also, if you haven't heard of VICTON, please go listen to their songs, they deserve more love♡ My favourite is Time of Sorrow >~<
> 
> Oh and do support them and the other trainees on Dear.101 :D okay I should stop talking hahahaha~

Seungwoo knew the moment he woke up that something was off. His head felt fuzzy, not the usual sleepiness as a result of late night practices and early mornings, no. Seungwoo felt like his head was underwater, heavy, and the occasional twige at the back of his skull didn't help. Seungwoo shook his head in attempts to shake off the feeling, but to no avail. If anything, it might have made it worst. He sighed, getting off the bed to wash up as the rest of his members from Team 'U Got It' stirred awake. It's nothing a few aspirins can't solve, he thought. 

By late morning, hours into their practice, Seungwoo could feel the onset of a migraine coming. The twige the back of his skull had slowly developed into a painful throb, one that was getting harder and harder to ignore. A sudden burst of pain caused him to knit his brows, face scrunched up momentarily before his neutral expression returned. The action was missed by most members, except Yohan, who gave him a concerned look. Seungwoo returned him with a gentle smile. He was their leader, he had to lead and guide the rest of the members in their team. He didn't need to add on to their worries, he could endure this. 

"Let's run through the song a few more times, before we break for lunch." Seungwoo instructed, as the start of 'U Got It' played and everyone got into their formation.

The rest of practice went much smoother than expected. By 12.30pm, Seungwoo had announced that they should go for a well deserved lunch break. Yun Seong smiled, while Eun Sang and Junho cheered, with Yohan joining in, prancing around the practice room in what seemed like his happy dance, causing the rest of the members to burst into laughter. Seungwoo watched from the floor as the rest of the members got up one by one and headed to the cafeteria excitedly. They're serving bulgolgi today, and while the portions were small, everyone loves beef. They'll take what they can get. The thought of food would normally make Seungwoo happy, but his headache was threatening to split his head open, and he didn't know whether he'd be able to stomach anything in.

A hand stretched out in front of him broke Seungwoo out of his reverie. He looked up, seeing Wooseok who stayed behind to wait for him. Seungwoo gave him a grateful smile before grabbing his hand, getting off the cold dance floor.

The sudden action sent shocks of pain to his head, making Seungwoo stumble over his feet. Dark spots dotted his vision, as he tried to blinked them back. Wooseok had reacted quickly, immediately supporting Seungwoo by his arms until he regained his balance.

"Are you alright, hyung?" 

Seungwoo steadied himself as his vision cleared up. Breathe in, breathe out. He forced a smile. "Yeah I'm fine, I probably just got up too fast. Was a bit dizzy."

Wooseok shot him a quizzical look, but didn't push the issue further. "Come on, let's go then. If not, the kids will eat up our share of bulgolgi."

It seemed like the rest of their team had decided to crash Team 'Move's table. Seungwoo and Wooseok collected their food, joining the rest of their teammates. Most of them were engaging in conversations, predicting who would win, with each one of them stating that their team was going to be in first place, albeit a little overconfidently. Wooseok had casually slid into the space next to Jinhyuk, who instinctively wrapped an arm around him. Seungwoo found the younger man's love for skinship endearing.  
A part of him found himself wishing for that sort of comfort, that familiarity and feeling of home, as he took his place in the seat next to Byungchan (he wondered if he had saved the seat for him). But he was the oldest amongst them, it just wasn't something he could ask for, and he brushed the thought to the back of his mind (which thankfully, had returned to a dull but somewhat tolerable throb).

"Hyung, how was practice?" Byungchan shot Seungwoo his typical dimple smile, which Seungwoo couldn't help but smile back. 

"Nothing special, the usual routine. The kids are getting better though so I think the performance will turn out well." Seungwoo replied, pushing the food around his plate. His stomach was starting to churn, and the food on his plate no longer looked very appetizing. 

Byungchan hummed in response. "That's good. Our team's having it rough, Kookheon's sick, and my leg hurts." Byungchan pouted at Seungwoo to prove his point, earning a smile from Seungwoo. How cute. "But we're determined to beat your team so be prepared."

That optimism was so like Byungchan. "I'll follow you to the doctor's tonight after practice. It's not good to worsen the injury, and with the way you're practicing, it's best to get it checked." Seungwoo stated, fondly stroking Byungchan's hair.

"Ah, hyung it's okay, I don't need you to follow me --- "

"I want to." Seungwoo replied, in a tone that told Byungchan not to argue with him. "We might not be with the rest of Victon right now, but we're family. I'll look out for you, make sure you're alright." He added, "It'll give me a peace of mind too anyways."

Byungchan smiled, "Thanks, Leader-nim."

Seungwoo nodded, before scooping up most of his food and beef, putting it on Byungchan's plate (which by then, was empty. Mnet really didnt give them enough food here.)

"No hyung, you should eat." Byungchan was about to return the food to Seungwoo's tray when Seungwoo refused.

"I'm not hungry. Besides, you need to eat more for your injury to heal faster."

"But still ---"

A sudden sharp pain spiked, causing Seungwoo to instinctively reach for his head, pressing against his temple. The abrupt wave of pain caused his stomach to churn, he could feel the bile running up his throat and it took all his effort to keep his food down.

"Hyung?"

"Wa-washroom, sorry." Seungwoo gave a Byungchan a curt reply, before quickly standing up and making a beeline to the washroom, ignoring the concerned looks of Byungchan and some of the other trainees at the table.

By now, Seungwoo might have admitted to himself that this migraine wasn't something he could just endure through and will away by sheer will power. The minute he reached the washroom, Seungwoo locked himself in one of the available cubicles, before doubling over the toilet bowl, vomitting the small amount of food he had eaten earlier. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes, whether from the force of his retching, the pain of the migraine or from the emotional turmoil of this entire situation, he did not know.

A sick Seungwoo was apparently a melancholic, emotional Seungwoo, because he can't stop his thought from racing back to Victon, to his other 6 members, one of whom was sitting at the cafeteria, probably suspecting that there's something wrong. He thinks of Victon, remembers why they're on this show in the first place, reminds himself it's this or possibly an infinite hiatus and in the worst case scenario, disbandment. A part of him wonders if it's his fault that their band is in this state. Maybe if he had been a better leader, they wouldn't be in such a situation. The thought makes him feel guilty. His thoughts returned back to one particular interview, on a variety show and how he said he was envious of Byungchan for having the privilege to say he's sick because he's one of the youngest. It's silly, he knows, because he's sure that's really nothing short of him being paranoid. That if he just said something, there were people who would care. But the leader part of him refuses to ask for help, refuses to let his members see him weak. Maybe it's something just inculcated in him, but he feels responsible to be the pillar of strength, regardless of circumstances. He was suppose to be strong. Seungwoo sighed. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't allow himself to entertain such negative thoughts. But being stuck in a cubicle alone, hunched over a toilet bowl with a severely pounding head and his lunch threatening to make a reappearance every few seconds, Seungwoo thought he could give himself a few minutes of self-pity.

"Hyung?"

A voice from outside toilet cubical breaks his train of thoughts.

A knock on the door. "Are you okay? I heard sounds." A little hesitation. " You don't sound well. Can I come in?"

Seungwoo breathes, catching his breath. He's not sure how he will reassure Byungchan he's fine (he himself doesn't really think he's fine either), but he'll try.

When he believes his meagre lunch won't make a reappearance again, Seungwoo replies. "No it's okay, I'm coming out soon." Seungwoo pushes himself off the toilet floor, swaying slightly on his feet before he steadies himself against the wall.

The door clicks open, and in front of him is Byungchan, worry written all over his face. Byungchan has always worn his heart on his sleeves, his emotions always evident for everyone to see. It's a reason why Seungwoo found himself so endeared to the younger. But right now, he sort of wished he couldn't read Byungchan like an open book. He wondered how bad he must have looked for Byungchan to have such an expression on his face.

"Seungwoo-hyung ---"

"I'm fine."

"You don't look fine."

Seungwoo sighed, turning on the tap and splashing his face with water. 

Byungchan didn't know how to broach the subject. Seungwoo has always been the strong hyung, always the one taking care of Byungchan and the rest of the members when they were sick/injured/in a bad mood. Byungchan doesn't remember the last time he saw his leader sick. He knows more often than not, Seungwoo puts up a front, so that the rest of them wouldn't worry. He recalls the one time Seungwoo caught a cold, and that it was a whole week before anyone of them, namely Seungsik, had realised, promptly forcing the elder to head to bed and rest. And they'd only discovered it because Seungwoo had been mildly delirious with fever. 

"I'm really fine, Byungchanie-ah" Seungwoo reassured him, though not looking at the younger.

Cautiously, Byungchan reached out to grab Seungwoo's shoulders, turning him gently to face him. Seungwoo sighed, giving Byungchan a gentle smile, though both of them knew it was strained at best. There's a weariness in Seungwoo's eyes, as if he's holding the weight of the world on his shoulders. Byungchan wonders if that's the price to pay for being a leader, and his heart aches at the thought.

"Byungchanie-ah ---"

"Hyung, please don't say you're fine when you're not." 

The statement catches Seungwoo off guard, and the pleading look in Byungchan's eyes startles Seungwoo. 

Byungchan drops his hands from Seungwoo's shoulders, opting to lace his fingers with Seungwoo's. "You don't have to endure everything alone. We're family. If you're tired, if you're not feeling well, if you just need someone to be there, to hold you, I'm here. You don't always have to be strong for us."

Seungwoo feels the sincerity in Byungchan's words, and a lump forms at the back of his throat. Maybe, deep down, he's been wishing for someone to say these words to him. He's been suppressing his own emotions long enough, a habit he should break. But to hear these words out loud... It feels foreign, but the warmth it brings is not unwelcomed. 

A tear slips from the corner of Seungwoo's eye, rolling down the side of his cheek. Its a first for Byungchan; he doesn't ever remember seeing Seungwoo cry. "Is there something wrong? Ah hyung, don't cry."

"I'm not." Seungwoo was about to reach and wipe the tear off, when Byungchan gently wipes it away with the back of his thumb. The action flusters Seungwoo slightly, but it makes him feel loved at the same time. He gives Byungchan a smile, a small one, but the most genuine smile he could muster today, and Byungchan appreciates it, smiling brightly with his dimple smile.

A sharp pain at the back of his skull ruins the atmosphere, knocking the wind out of Seungwoo and sending him doubling over. Byungchan reacts instinctively, catching Seungwoo and lowering him till both of them were kneeling on the ground. Seungwoo curses (another first for Byungchan, Seungwoo always has a tight rein on his temper), and he curls his hands tightly into fists, pressing them against his temple till his fists turned white. 

The whole situation happened so fast, it took Byungchan by surprise, and it took everything in him not to panic right that instant.

"Hyung? Hyung, what's wrong?" Byungchan clasped his hands over Seungwoo's fists, in attempts to prevent the elder from hurting himself. Seungwoo looked as if he was ready to punch his skull off (if that were even possible). Byungchan attempted to meet Seungwoo's eyes, trying to get a response from his hyung, making sure he was still conscious and aware.

"Mi-migraine." Seungwoo chokes out, as another wave of pain hits him, and he shudders, forcing back a sob. "It-it'll pass."

In his entire life, Byungchan has only felt this helpless once, and that was when their manager had announced Victon's hiatus. The fear, the feeling of helplessness and uselessness rushes back, and Byungchan just wants to cry. But he can't, not when Seungwoo, his friend, his leader, his brother, is obviously hurting. So Byungchan does the only thing he can do at the moment. He wraps his arms around Seungwoo, embracing him in a hug, guiding his head to the crook of his shoulder and has the elder lean against him. Byungchan feels the shudders that courses through Seungwoo's frame, hears the soft groans, and he does his best to shush them, soothingly patting Seungwoo's back in attempts to provide some form of comfort.

When the migraine dulls into a bearable, pulsating headache, Seungwoo sighs for the upteenth time that day. "I hate this."

Hate is a strong word. Byungchan nods, stroking Seungwoo's hair, and lets Seungwoo stay in his embrace for as long as he needs. 

"Not just the migraine. I mean this show, I mean our situation, how we're away from the rest of the members, with no idea what will happen after all this ends. I hate not knowing what will happen to Victon, what will happen to us."

Byungchan tightens his hold on Seungwoo, because he knows the feeling, understands exactly what his hyung means. He feels Seungwoo's breathe tickle the nape of his neck as he releases a sigh, the weariness evident in it.

"If I was a better leader, maybe we wouldn't need to be here."

That statement caught Byungchan off guard.

"That's not true hyung!" Byungchan exclaimed, a bit too loudly, and Seungwoo tenses at the sudden exclamation. Byungchan pulls away from Seungwoo, biting his lower lip, smiling sheepishly as an apology for shocking him. "Really, we couldn't have ask for a better leader. You're always taking care of us, talking to the managers for us, speaking to the CEO on behalf of Victon and bearing the scoldings thrown at you. You watch out for us, make sure we're eating enough, that we're happy and well fed. You sneakily buy us the food we want when Seungsik doesn't let us buy it." Seungwoo smirks slightly at the comment. "You're always worrying for us, but you don't let us worry for you. I'm grateful, and sorry that you keeping bearing these burdens alone."

Seungwoo makes no verbal comment, but adverts his gaze, embarrassed by the compliments. "There's nothing to be sorry for. I'm the hyung, it's what I'm suppose to do."

Byungchan smiles, pulling Seungwoo in for another hug. "But even hyung should have someone to depend on too. Whatever happens, we'll always be here together, all 7 of us. I'll be here for you."

Seungwoo smiles into Byungchan's chest, and Byungchan feels the corners of his lips turn upwards. "You're being cheesy."

"But you like it."

And Seungwoo doesn't deny it, nuzzling into the crook of Byungchan's neck. "Yeah, I do."

After resting for another 5 minutes, with Seungwoo's condition more or less stable, Byungchan speaks up. "Feeling better? Does your head still hurt?"

"I'll manage." Seungwoo's reply earns him a frown from Byungchan, his face literally screaming 'what did I tell you about pretending to be fine when you're not', and he promptly edits his response. "I could use some aspirins." 

"I'll get some from Jinhyuk-hyung, he has some strong medication just for migraines in his bag." 

"Thanks."

Byungchan hums. "We'll go to the doctor's tonight." The look on his face tells Seungwoo not to argue with him. "For now, let's head back to the dorms."

"I need to head back to practice."

Byungchan sighs. "Hyung, I'm sure your team will be fine without their leader for one day. Wooseok-hyung can handle it. You going back there for practice will only worsen your condition."

Seungwoo knew Byungchan was right, but still ----

"And I really can't watch you wear yourself down like this. I cant afford to lose you." 

There's fear in Byungchan's voice, and Seungwoo gives in. "I'm not going anywhere."

Byungchan smiles. "Okay, let's go back then. You need to rest." He turns such that his back is facing Seungwoo, gesturing to Seungwoo to get on. Seungwoo is perplexed.

"Come on, I'll carry you back."

If his head didn't hurt so much, Seungwoo would have laughed his head off over the thought of Byungchan attempting to carry him. 

"Sorry Byungchanie-ah, but you don't even have the strength to carry the dumbbells at the gym, much less carry me."

Byungchan turns back and there's a look of dismay plastered all over his face. Seungwoo feels sorry, giving him an apologetic look. It looked like someone had kicked a puppy (and overgrown puppy). Nevertheless, Seungwoo's heart swells with warmth. Seungwoo laughs lightly, and it's enough to make Byungchan happy and reassure him that he's fine. Byungchan laughs along, his eyes disappearing into crescents. 

Carefully, Seungwoo attempts to get up, push himself off the floor. It only registers now that they're sprawled on the cold washroom floor, and that can't be hygienic. Sensing what Seungwoo was doing, Byungchan immediately reaches out to support him, helping him onto his feet. Seungwoo sways slightly, small dark spots still sorting his vision slightly before he blinks them away. He links his arm around Byungchan's, and leans against him, partially for support, partially for the familiarity and the warmth that it brings.

And Byungchan smiles, glad that his hyung wasn't trying to bear everything alone.

"Whenever you need to, lean on me, hyung."

**Author's Note:**

> (Please feel free to skip this ending notes, it's just thoughts, if anyone wants to talk about Produce x 101 feel free to hit me up hahahaha)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it! I'm so sad Byungchan is leaving Produce x 101, not just cos he's leaving but also cos I've just realised he must have been in so much pain, especially when they made them do the ×2 speed for Move >~< and he just smiled and laughed everything off :(((( criesss okay I hope he gets well soon, and I hope Seungwoo won't be too affected by this (and I realised VICTON won't have their leader with them if Seungwoo makes it to the final line up and Idk how to feel about that....)


End file.
